Know thyself before you dress thyself. In a world that tells us all to be the same, we must walk in the opposite direction and express our souls instead. And making your style your own is a good place to start.
To express yourself creatively, you must first know yourself. Or at least know enough about yourself that you know what you want to express.
A personal style is just that, the style of your person, the person inside of you. Many of us hide that person, cage him in or tie him up. Tell him not to make a sound. And then we go about our business, living under the gaze of others, crying behind our laughing masks.
To truly have a personal style, and dare to express yourself through fashion, you must first dare to look yourself in the mirror. Look at yourself without looking away. See yourself, truly see yourself for who you are. Not just who you are pretending to be. Do this every day until it is no longer painful, difficult or sad. Until you are smiling back at yourself.
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How Do You Get To Know Yourself?
The age-old question. However many find themselves wondering the opposite. How can I escape myself? The response to the latter is you can’t. Not really. You are you, and no matter where you run to or who you pretend to be, you will still be yourself. Deep down at least.
It doesn’t matter if people see it or not. If they notice there is someone else inside there, dying to be free. Literally dying. It is possible to kill your own soul, or at least shatter it. Did you know?
A shattered soul
When something deeply traumatic happens, our souls may shatter, or shards may fall off and be left there, as no more than a memory. It is not for naught that shamans work with soul retrievals.
A lost soul isn’t just a poetic description of heartache, but it is real and it can ruin a person’s life. We can’t go by without our souls. And even if it is just a shard or two that has gone missing, we will notice. Imagine a teapot if you will. It has fallen to the ground and then someone picked up the pieces they could find and put it back together. Mended it with glue. All but a single shard is in place. But that one missing shard will be the reason the pot keeps leaking. Why it can no longer be used. Why it has now lost its purpose.
Sit with your soul
To get to know yourself, you need to sit with yourself. Without judgment or fear, ask yourself questions. Treat yourself like another person that you are getting to know from scratch. What would you ask them? What would you want to know? Ask yourself those questions. Make a list of the things you like, the things that make you feel glad to be alive.
Listen to music, all kinds of music, and allow yourself to show you what you like and what you do not care for.
Continue like this, with all areas of life. It is so very easy to lose yourself along the way, so we must keep getting to know ourselves. Keep listening to our own hearts, asking the right questions and not fearing what the answers might be.
Once You Know Who You Are, How Can Fashion Help You Express It?
That’s the fun part. We live in a world full of colours, patterns, centuries worth of fabrics, modern garments, traditional garments, shoes of every variety – the list goes on.
When you remove the shackles, the needs, the musts and the what-ifs, all you have left are opportunities. So grab them. Again, without fear and judgement, pick up each garment, each colour, each texture and allow your inner self to tell you what you like, what feels right.
Find your colours
Colour psychology is a real thing. Certain colours make us feel certain ways. And the right colours? Ah, the right colours can open up new worlds for us, new opportunities and full hearts. When we find our colours and begin to surround ourselves with them and wear them, we vibe high. We are lifted to a higher frequency that invites more opportunities, love and fortune into our lives. Mentally, it clears our minds and gives us hope. Something we could all do right about now.
Start from the beginning
As though you were showing a child the world of fashion, someone who knew nothing of it, show yourself everything and note how you feel about it. Try everything you can get your hands on, and don’t mind such things as labels, sizes or any of that. Just feel your way and listen to yourself.
Go over your own wardrobe and consider what the garments feel like on your body, what you see when you look in the mirror and how wearing them makes you feel. Thank and declutter anything that does not align with your soul, and find a replacement in something that does.
Make a mood board, if it helps, and gather all sorts of references that match your innermost being. Quotes, fonts, colours, garments, photos – whatever you feel aligns. That will be the base for your style. It is as simple as finding garments, accessories and shoes that match that feeling. Build your wardrobe little by little, and be sure of each item you add to it.
Fear mustn’t come into it. Nor doubt. Fashion is art. It doesn’t have to be beautiful or make people feel a certain way. It is there to express something, and that something is your soul. And it is there to make people feel something, and that can be anything.
Let go and find your way.
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